What If You Stopped Trying to ‘Prove’ Your Creativity?
You made a thing. You feel good about the thing. You put the thing into the world and the response you desired to get from it is… less than encouraging.* You feel despondent. You feel unworthy. You feel like the hours you put into this thing were wasted.
Guess what?
They weren’t wasted. Creativity and creative expression are not reflective of your value nor worth. And other people’s opinions on your creative pursuits are in no way indicators of your skill, effort, or personality (even when it feels like it).
We have reached an era where the external push to make things is almost superfluous to the push to share things. This publicizing of our lives, our individual selves, exposes us to unecessary judgement of facets of life that were never meant to be public spectacle. And it’s put pressure on us to perform and prove ourselves for any title we claim or opinion we have.
And that is entirely antithetical to why we need creativity in our lives.
Creativity allows us to explore our thoughts, feelings, needs, and desires. Those explorations are vital to our mental, emotional, and physical health (seriously, look it up). Creative activities keep our minds and bodies healthier, more equipped to deal with unexpected circumstances, calmer in the face of stress, and more. And we’re the only species in the known universe that can use our bodies to create everything from paintings and music to theatre and glass blown sculpture, from digital architecture to our own clothing, from sand castles to cathderals, and so many other amazing things.
The whole concept of having to perform or prove ourselves as creatives negates the individualized specialness of creating in the first place. Only you can create what speaks to your inner self, what fuels your dreams, what soothes your stresses, what expresses your voice. The idea that anyone else has agency over that is nonsensical, and yet that is the landscape for so many creators.**
So here’s a challenge to those already creating on a regular basis, either as a profession or in their free time, but sharing that part of their work with the world: find something creative that you do just for yourself, and that you don’t show anyone.
It doesn’t have to be a big project. It doesn’t have to be the same activity every day. It should be something you can do or work on in 5-10 minute sprints, with minimal prep. Spend a month (or at least 10 sessions, however long that takes for you) doing that activity. Don’t tell the internet about it. Don’t even think about trying to monetize it or tie it into any other venture or project.
One thing. Just for you.
Refill your creative kettle without anyone else’s input. See what emotions come up. See what ideas flourish (or flounder). See how long you can keep it up without the temptation to post about it.
And then, if it worked for you, keep going. Keep that thing (or things) for yourself, without a view to making it another job, or side huslte, or showcase to lure people in for your other projects.
Creating can be uncomfortable, emotionally. Sometimes it needs to be. It’s a reflection and insight into your very individual, personal self, and even the prettiest pictures can bring up deep, conflicting emotions. As humans it is our privilege to experience those emotions and find ways of expressing, exploring, and dealing with a huge range of feelings.
And the pill that can be difficult to swallow: You may never feel ‘ready’ as a creator. You may suffer from imposter syndrome for years. You may doubt the validity of your work, your talent, your form of expression. But if you let insecurity guide you, you’ll never know what you’re capable of, as a creative or as a human being.
*Harsh truth we’ll address in future: once you put something you create into the world, you open yourself up to any and all feedback. And in a certain way, that thing no longer belongs to you; it belongs to whoever interacts with it.
**This isn’t even addressing the myth of AI ‘creativity’ — yes, we said myth and put creativity in sarcastic quotes, and we meant it. The tl;dr of that for now is: a generative prompt in no way, shape or form, is using your own mind, hands, and heart to actually create something of your own. Only your personal body and mind can create. And if you’re stuck on the what or the how, there are hundreds if not thousands of websites, books, videos, podcasts, etc. to help you narrow your focus or teach you how to do something — ones created by other humans, not a learning machine that stole knowledge and experience from those humans to regurgitate it into something completely inauthentic. And if you don’t know what your ‘voice’ is, the only way forward is through, not taking a shortcut to let a machine decide what it should be for you.
